Thoughts on a Thursday

Ah, the frustration of wanting to write something but not having anything to write. I remember exercises in writing classes in high school where we were timed and had to keep writing without stopping for five, ten, or even the full fourty-five minutes in class. Those were the worst. I tend not to actually remember anything from those years, but I know those pages were usually just filled with song lyrics. Because they always say to just write what comes to your head and I have a radio station set up in mine apparently.

All this to say that I’m not one to sit and just write any random thing. You may call this random, and it may be, but at the same time it isn’t really. I’m really good at getting off-topic and wandering down bunny trails, but they aren’t really. What I’m trying to say is there is no stream of consciousness ever happening over here.

This may be why, though I’ve tried, I never really got journaling. I know, it’s supposed to be good for you, but I just don’t get how to do it. Yes, technically this is a journal, but I’m talking the ones where you “write your feelings” or “write about your day”. I tried this last year with a day planner and writing things that happened during the day, but that got boring. I think I made it to September or October before giving up completely, and even then I was sitting down trying to remember things that happened weeks at a time because I would just plain forget to write, or not want to.

It might have to do with my aversion to “daily” tasks. Despite my ability to watch the same show over and over again, or keep the same record on repeat for a month, I kind of hate repetition. I think it comes from the fact that every time you watch or listen to something, the circumstances change and it isn’t that repetitive. My mom would argue the opposite, but that’s how it feels to me. So writing over and over again, “Took kids to park. Watched baseball practice, etc.” got boring fast.

Then again, we are all supposed to have our own individual set of talents. Even if you and the person next to you can both play the same range on the same instrument, for example, you each bring a unique interpretation to the music. So maybe journaling isn’t the best thing for everyone. Maybe we each need to find our own release. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go play my flute before the baby gets home for nap time. That seems like a more productive use of my time right now in my mind.

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